Manners

I think working in various retail stores since 2008 has given me quite the unpleasant view of the way people can be so awful to others. I reckon anyone who has worked in any sort of customer service position can relate. Generally speaking, most people aren't friendly or they are just aloof and aren't really there to do anything but look. However, you do get those people who are so nasty that you wonder if they were ever taught to be freaking nice to people. I'm surely not Miss Manners, but I try. I try to be polite and respectful of other people because it's just the way to be. Just because someone is pouring your drink and folding the clothes you want to buy, it does not mean they are of an inferior race of humans. Yet, sadly, some people do treat us that way.

Don't get me wrong, those of us who work in customer service are not always majestic, perfect little angels. We've all experienced poor service somewhere. I once went to a bar where I got a drink that had a bug in it, and the waiter basically ignored me the entire night in a seemingly deliberate fashion. I wasn't rude, I just wanted a drink void of a dead bug. I've also experienced walking into a store where the employees don't even acknowledge my presence, sit around gossiping, swearing on the floor, or stalk me around the store as if I'm a thief. Recently, I went into a bookstore to order a book and the employee did not ask me to verify the edition I wanted. I looked up the copy he ordered for me, and it was abridged (considering the book is originally 1500 pages, and this version was near 600...yeah no thank you). Personally, I guess if I saw different editions/prices for a book coming up, I'd ask the customer which it would be that they want. This list goes on of fouls. Sometimes we customer service people do suck because we are patronizing or too smothering or completely negligent. It happens.

As an employee, I do try, with earnest, to be polite and respectful to people. However, sometimes it's really difficult when people will not ever stoop to say "hello" back to you when you greet them. Today, I watched a woman basically throw a shopping bag at my co-worker. Then, while she was shopping, she had a decent number of items racked on her arm. In EVERY clothing store I've worked, I've been taught to ask a customer with full hands if they'd like a fitting room started so they don't have to carry all of these heavy clothes about. I politely asked her if I could start her a room, and she says "No. I will let you know when I need help." I could understand if we had been pushy or rude to her, but we weren't. I mean, she was planning to try all of these clothes on, and she had several articles of clothing, why wouldn't you want your hands free? Something so trivial as that to be rude about. Rudeness for the sake of rudeness.

None of us had been rude to her, as is often the case when people are snarky to customer service employees. I've seen circumstances in which the customer surly reaction to an employee was justified because we were being disrespectful. Personally, I can't stand when I feel like I'm being followed in a store, but if that happens, I'll leave. I'm not about to get pissy because it's hardly worth the energy.

Honestly, I joke about it a lot, but I really think that manners should be taught in schools because seemingly they aren't learning them at home. Politeness, "please," "thank you," a "hello" back, etc. it gets you so far in life! And it is so appreciated. Don't be disrespectful of us because we are in customer service. Many of us are college educated, or just intelligent without the need of a degree (some of us do suffer from stupidity, in fairness). We are humans. We make mistakes. We would not try to offend you on purpose because if we did that we would get fired, and not a single person these days can stand to lose their job even if they are in something like food service or retail. Forgive us if we apologize; I promise, we mean it when we do.

I think schools should implement manners/etiquette into their curriculum through the grade school years and into university. They teach us to play nice with others in kindergarten, but they never continue to lesson! From respecting other people, to dining manners to job interview manners, I think it would be tremendously worthwhile if we taught these things in schools.

I also think at some point everyone should experience customer service. Nothing teaches you patience and humility in such a hands-on way.  Whenever I go into a store now, I do my best to be respectful. If the employee speaks to me, I kindly reply. If I pick something up or knock it over, I put it back as it was. I often will talk to them because they are surely bored out of their mind if it's a slower working day. And having to deal with someone that's a virtual stranger being mean to you doesn't always get easier. Eventually, you do learn to let it slide and laugh it off, but it's still a slow process to develop a thick skin, if you ever do.